Soooo, today was my baby's four month birthday. I can hardly believe he's the same little boy we brought home from the hospital. He's so big now!
Last night as I struggled to get to sleep, I recalled what Jonathan looked like when he was born. He came out and let out one cry to take in his first breath and that was it. He was far too preoccupied looking at the new world around him to realize he should be crying. He was so very long and skinny. He was so tiny, he didn't even fit his newborn clothes. He had little swirls of hair all over his tiny body that was silky smooth. He even had it on his bitty little ears. I loved to stroke them. On the tops of his legs, he had little man hairs and a swirl on his back right above his bum, dark and far more course than the silky fine hair that covered the rest of his body. Born able to hold his head up for long periods of time and a very strong sense of curiousity, I could barely get him to look at me for longer than 3 seconds before he was off trying to see things beyond his vision. His skin smelled sweeter than anything I'd ever breathed before. It was like I couldn't get enough of it. His breath was even sweeter. Sounds strange, but I remembered my step-mom said her babies all had the sweetest smelling breath and I had to see if she wasn't crazy. =) His smell was intoxicating. Everything about him was so pure and wonderful.
The nurses told me not to sleep with him in the hospital bed, but he wouldn't be consoled any other way. I'd put him on me tummy to tummy and he'd sleep there until the I'd hear the nurse knock and I'd quickly wake up and pretend to feed him. I just couldn't seem to put him down. His sweet little spirit permeated my whole world.
I just can't seem to grasp how fast it's all gone. Like sands through the hourglass, so are the days of our lives. (Hee, hee.) But really, it's true. It's a blur. I miss his itty bitty self.